Episode Description
What in the world would cause us to create a podcast? And, why in the world would you want to hang out with us here? In this episode, Pat and Amy discuss what led to them showing up in your podcast feed. And, they tell you more about who they are as people — the experiences they’ve had and the experiences shaping them today. As always, Amy cries.
Resources Mentioned in this Episode
Nobody Makes It Alone: www.nobodymakesitalone.com
Other (potentially) Useful Links
We suggest infusing a little gratitude into your day. Here’s a way to begin from Mindful.org: https://www.mindful.org/an-introduction-to-mindful-gratitude/
Transcript
PAT: Hello, welcome to Going Older. I’m Pat Going,
AMY: And I’m Amy Going Haworth.
PAT: This is a podcast about aging from the perspective of two generations.
AMY: I’m a mid-lifer experiencing the sandwich generation,
PAT: And I’m a baby boomer experiencing the golden years. This podcast tackles what we’re talking about as it relates to living life well.
AMY: And it seeks to bring the conversations we’re having as parent and child into the open so that we can all learn together. On today’s episode we’re talking about why we’re doing this. What caused us to start this podcast from the beginning, and what we’re hoping to really achieve by doing it together. Dad –
PAT: Well, I think this will be very interesting and and I’ll be very curious on what you say, quite frankly. Just to give you a bit of summary, Amy and I thought that maybe we could do a quick back story on who and the heck we are and then what has prompted today’s episode. So do you want to start first, Amy? What’s your background without making it four pages?
AMY: You got it. It’s probably really important to know just why would you want to spend time with us, and parts of of my back story include being an only child. The closest thing I came to having no siblings was having two imaginary friends and this wasn’t recent. Thankfully, I can say those imaginary friends were part of my early childhood. I lived primarily in the western United States, although currently I live in the Southeast, in the great state of Florida – quite a long way from where you and Mom are. These days I have a family and I spend my time coaching, speaking, and helping organizations through change. That’s my vocation, and what I truly believe I was made to do – was listen. It does make doing a podcast, which is a lot of me speaking, feel a little unusual. But the big thing to know as it relates to this podcast is I’m really committed to sharing what I know; to connecting people with resources; and to hopefully help make life easier for as many people as I possibly can. And the other thing to know related to this podcast, is I love you and Mom, deeply. We have been a tight knit crew – a bit of the three musketeers for for many decades of life. So talking about aging is a really tender subject at times because frankly I can’t imagine not having you and Mom in this world with me.
PAT: Do you have an existing website if people want to get a little more information about you?
AMY: I do. It’s Nobody Makes It Alone dot com. That is the name of my business. Nobody Makes It Alone is a very happy sponsor of this podcast. But if people want to check out who who I am, the kinds of work that I do, see Nobody Makes It Alone dot com is the best place to learn a little bit more.
PAT: Good. Well, I’ll take over now, and try and condense 78 years of of life into about two minutes. Real quickly, I grew up in California, in the Palo Alto area, Silicon Valley, and it was just a fabulous time to be. Apricot orchards were everywhere and it was before the big California boom. I went to Cal. Berkeley; became an Air Force officer; and thankfully received an assignment at the Air Force Academy, where I met your Mother. After the Air force, I managed large athletic complexes in Denver and and then in Jackson Hole; followed by a long career as Director in a six-state area ADA Technical Assistant Center. ADA is the Americans with Disabilities Act. So I have been very involved with disability issues and helping people with disabilities, businesses and government entities to understand what their rights and responsibilities are under the ADA.
Thinking why we are doing this, Amy, one reason is in today’s world, families are so scattered, unlike fifty years ago. Families used to have their generations near by, in the same town, and literally, sometimes in the same block. And those days have left us. We are so dispersed now. When we’re looking at Senior Living, whatever form that might be, the fact is people are so scattered. I think the multi-generation perspectives have really become quite important and worth considering. This adds other variables because obviously we’re living longer. So having these aging subjects come up is so important.
AMY: Absolutely, and I think this idea of us doing a podcast came because you’ve been learning so much about some of the big decisions associated with being 78 years old. And as I remember it, you mentioned starting a blog, and I said that’s cool – that’s a great idea for sharing. However, it’s been my experience that blog readership is going down. Have you ever thought of doing A podcast? And as we started to think through this, what we realized is these journeys that we’re on, they intersect at some big decisions for families. It’s the ebb and flow of our family life.
Borrowing from my corporate career, this idea to look at these moments that matter, which these are, these points of time when decisions are also so emotionally laden, are typically what we define as a Moment that Matters. And at this phase in life, it feels like there’s a lot of Moments that Matter suddenly. So as we started to think about the topics for this podcast, I think our initial thoughts kind of hovered in that Moments that Matter space. Things like choosing to move out of the decade-long home you are living in independently; a house full of things; staying healthy; down sizing; making choices where maybe not everyone is in agreement initially, with these big life choices. As we started to think about these topics, other ideas are emerging as aging is not only for people in their golden years. Often times the big focus on aging has just related to the late stage of life. However, I’ve had a lot of aging thoughts lately. My body doesn’t move the way it used to. My mind doesn’t work as quick as it used to. I have a lot more gray hair than the people I’m sitting in meetings with these days, So it’s very in the present for me, as I also watch members of my family, my immediate family age as well. So this whole idea of aging from different perspectives, and it’s not lost on me, that I’m also aging. You’ve lived already in this season that I’m in. You’ve already walked this road. What I’m really looking forward to is understanding your perspective about where you are; getting to know my Dad a little bit better in different ways; seeing the world through your eyes; and then also getting some of your wisdom. Finally you know it’s only taken me this long to be able to ask for my parent’s advice on things. Finally I’m realizing you know a lot about the same things that I’m kind of muddling through right now and I better start asking the questions.
PAT: Well, hopefully we’re as smart as you think we are, but I’m not sure that is the case. As we’ve embarked on this new project, it is quite exciting also on my end. Saying the same things back to you, I’m learning a great deal about my Daughter! I mean how confident she is in the corporate world, and I’m also realizing that things I tell her to do now, she won’t necessarily do. Ha ha. She’s a very independent person. We have learned some things already that I hope we can share because this transition from a home to independent living is a physical, mental, and financial journey. Really major topics that thankfully, we are having a little bit of time to consider. I’m very sympathetic to friends that all of a sudden have a major life event – an injury or an accident, some sort of disease, and they don’t have the luxury of time to approach these decisions. So unfortunately, I know a lot of decisions can be pretty impulsive and in hindsight, might not have been the best thing. But they didn’t have the benefit of time. So we’re going to have some tips, I believe, and this is educating us also along the way.
AMY: Absolutely. We’re really excited for our listeners – for all of you to come on this journey with us. We do have a web site at Going Older dot com. There is a contact form there, and we welcome your suggestions. Your curiosities. What would you like to hear us talk about? Which kinds of guests would you like to hear from on our show. We really want you to help us create this Journey together. Every day that goes by means we’re all aging. We consider you fellow travelers and would love to design this experience in a way that helps you make the most of it as well.
Pat: Well, I think that’s great. I’m excited.
AMY: Me too!
PAT: let’s do this again next week.
AMY: That sounds great. Well, let me close us out with a ritual that we do here on gGing oOder, which is around closing with some gratitude. So today as we sit here, it’s a Friday afternoon. 1:30 Eastern. I am curious, Dad. What are you grateful for?
PAT: I had the perfect walk of gratitude this morning. It was just so terrific. I was by myself, at a nearby park. It was so ideal and I thought this just epitomizes what a walk of gratitude is. And looking at Pikes Peak
AMY: Wow, that sounds amazing. Well, as far as my gratitude, I was challenged today in new ways. I was grateful for just the humility that I still have a lot of growing to do as there was a particular situation that I think I could have handled better. I’m not going to beat myself up about it. The older version of me would have, but it’s a great humbling reminder that we are all still works-in-progress.
AMY: On that note, I am going to close us out. This is a podcast about aging but it’s actually also a podcast about living, So get out there and live life. Talk to you next time.
Some really good reasons for doing a podcast – even though there are many to choose from these days. Unique perspectives from different generations.